In the sad situation in which Steve McNair came to his death, at the hands of an illicit lover, what does appear to be obvious details of the murder-suicide is something authorities haven’t revealed, and won’t. All of McNair’s friends are doing their best to paint a picture that cleanses the quarterback’s character. But for naught, for this would appear to be the truth of the matter:

Sahel Kazemi, the 20-year-old waitress McNair reportedly met at Dave and Buster’s, had come to realize the situation as it really was. The alleged gift of a Cadillac just a few days before was not enough to throw her off course. The delusion that McNair was divorcing his wife to marry her was finally realized as a pure charade.

He had led her on. He had led her on for six months, she was a mere passing victim in an all-star athlete’s life. Something triggered a realization that he was not divorcing his wife, that she had been a toy in his clutches, and she moved into action. If she couldn’t have him, nobody else could. So she bought a gun. She met him in their trysting place on a Saturday, she turned the gun on him, then made her one-shot exit. The fact that she shot him four times indicates a deep fury. (You turn on “Frankie and Johnnie” for background music here).

A 36-year-old former football star, everybody’s hero, and a vulnerable 20-year-old from a foreign country—a sorrowfully serious mismatch which sheds the football star of his cloak as a one-time hero. It is what it is, a sad reality, despite the efforts to give it a shiny coat.